Fingers crossed

This is my favourite time of the month. Ovulation has come and gone, we’ve done all we can and now have to wait and see. In two weeks or so the results will be in and then I will be either disappointed or terrified. 


So I like this time of the month because it’s full of hope and potential. The pain of losing Peanut is just that little bit less because there’s a possibility I could be pregnant again. But I don’t know one way or the other, so the fear that will inevitably come with a real-life pregnancy is absent.

There’s no point in trying to guess whether I am or not, for me most of the symptoms of early pregnancy are identical to those of an imminent period. Also I deliberately do not know exactly when I’m due on, I don’t want to build it up. It’s out of my hands now.

For now I’ll just happily bask in the hazing glow of not knowing.