Driving nerves - the follow up

My initial attempts to get my driving nerves under control appear to have been successful. Every time anxiety raised its head rather than trying to soothe myself with deep breathing or force myself to think of something else, I turned around and conversed directly with the demon, “Nope, I’m not scared, I’ll be fine, I can do this…” (much stronger terms may have also been used!) On top of that I tried to explore what I was actually afraid of, which was surprisingly difficult to decipher since nothing seemed to warrant the level of fear I was experiencing, but once something was identified I’d calmly talk myself through what I needed to do, how I needed to approach it.

I had to do this numerous times but you know what? By the time I got in the car I actually felt reasonably okay and the driving lesson went really well, such phrases as “coming on leaps and bounds” were used – how exciting!

Now I know the battle is not over yet, such demons don’t give up so easily and quite often change tactics in order to win, they are devious critters. But I will battle on.

This has made me realise something important though, we learn valuable lessons as we go through life but we then take it for granted that we will always retain this wisdom. In reality sometimes we forget it. I learned this method of battling anxiety and panic at 17. I fought hard to learn that lesson and yet nearly 20 years later when I needed it the knowledge was almost forgotten.

So in order to avoid repeating past mistakes or patterns of behaviour I think it’s time for a refresher course in the wisdom (ahem!) I’ve gained during my years on this planet. This weekend I’ll be digging back through a few old diaries to see what I can find. Watch this space!